Conversations with Myself

Welcome to my uncensored mind;
an entertaining journey,
Moving You
further towards awakening….

Last night, I journeyed on a sunset hike to an angelic spot on Earth just minutes from my door. Yes, I know how lucky I am - by the way, luck and perfect manifestation are one in the same but that’s for another day’s thoughts - will someone remind me to write about that? Thank you (you know who you are). Anyway, back to the sunset hike. Once upon the mountain’s bench, I found myself wondering on a path I had never encountered before. It brilliantly led me to a magnificent boulder overlooking the Valley of Salt Lake. That boulder (a pebble to a giant) represented my presence and purpose here on Earth. rfhy

I boosted myself up.

As I laid upon her strength and power, I realized that she was unshakeable in every sense. Without even a flutter, she withstands anything and everything without effort or sacrifice in any way. I am She. She is Me. I am filled with Divine Giddiness by even the thought! Divine Giddiness is when you finally (and really) get the cosmic joke. What’s the cosmic joke? That too, my friend, is for another day.

Anyway, back to the rock (did you know that the rock of Gibraltar is really an Island protruding from Spain? It is a full living military base for the U.K with tons of wild monkey’s running around wrecking havoc on the poor tourists). Remind me to tell you about the “pushing fight” I got into with one of the wise grandmother monkeys - we’ll let her believe that she won but you and I know the truth. O.K. so, yes, this is what it is like inside my busy mind. It’s a new fun adventure every day. Sometimes I think “how can I keep up with myself?” But, I always do. It’s perfect that way. When I get too far ahead, I wait for my other selves to catch up so we can all play together - in the sun or snow. Yummy!

What was I saying about me and the rock? Oh, yeh. Thanks for reminding me. As I was lazily lying on the rock watching the sun move beyond the horizon, I started thinking about an odd ear problem that I have had for almost three years now. No matter what healing I have offered it, on the physical, emotional and spiritual plains, the darn thing refuses to heal. I laugh to myself - I can heal others of terminal cancer but I can’t heal a silly clogged ear. Then it occurred to me; not only was there nothing to heal (there NEVER is - and that’s the point - think about it), but my right (continuously, clogged) ear has been offering me a great gift all along.

Up until that moment, I thought the gift was to remind me to listen, with even more clarity at increasingly deeper levels, to myself and others. But that wasn’t it. It didn’t have to give me a gift I already owned and cherished. Instead, it was another grand gift in disguise. In an instant, I clearly understood that my right ear is not working to it’s perfect capacity so that I would have to learn how to listen with my left ear - both literally and figuratively. The clogged ear would often make me revert to my less dominant left ear - which otherwise would have never occurred to me. It partially shut down so that it’s partner in hearing could be strengthened. WoW! That’s an aha moment (I have them several times a day and you can too). Once I got the gift, I thanked the right ear and released it from it’s duty to remain clogged so lefty could catch up and play in the same game. But even as I released it, it still wouldn’t go. Then I got it.

Even though I have the awareness and knowledge to actively use my left ear much more than the right in order to strengthen it, I still need a constant reminder. Without the uncomfortable clog in righty, I would keep forgetting to remember to actively use and strengthen my left ear. I would be “lazy”. Instead, my ingenious body put a plan in action where I would be constantly reminded and even forced to rely more and more on lefty. I am completely confident that the second lefty is as well developed and as skillful as righty, righty will shape back up and lefty and righty will be harmonious well and in perfect hearing order. With this in mind, I suddenly became extremely grateful for the 35 months of discomfort caused by a perpetually clogged ear.

If only I would have listened sooner! Excuse the pun - or don’t. It’s up to you and I will love you just the same - laugh at my jokes or laugh at me and I still love you the same. Others have already tried to prove my love conditional - but they failed and you will too. Thought I would tell you that to save you the time and trouble; yours not mine. I’ll play that game until you win and you always will - the stakes are in my favor every time with everyone. How cool is that? I am my own slot machine - always ready to win! By the way, for you business folks who have been trained in this “win-win” crap. Did I say “crap”? Oops and sorry; I meant business and relationship strategy. Yes, that’s easier for some to digest and mull over until it’s completely digested and it’s unusuable parts are eliminated like Crap! There I said it again. Crap, Crap, Crap. For those of you, who think that I am being horribly un-spiritual, according to your storyline of do’s and don’ts of spiritually, you are one hundred percent correct; pardon my mouth, or in this case, I guess it’s my butt. O.K. we’ve gone too far down that rabbit hole - and I blame you! Of course I really don’t. If I blamed anyone for anything, I would be making them more powerful than me and handing away the reins of my life in that respect. I don’t do that – any more.

I am powerful and I express myself powerfully because I take fully responsibility (without blame or shame) for EVERYTHING that happens in my life or in my perception of the world. If I don’t like what I am seeing or experiencing, I simply change my perception by changing the story to one that is more in alignment with a higher and more divine truth. So, even if my neighbor paint balls my house with glow in the dark, lime green, paint balls, I never blame him. Yes, I will set boundaries and create accountability but I will never blame him for what he “does to me”. For I know that whatever he does to me or around me is simply my unconscious mind projecting itself out into the world and I certainly can’t blame him for simply mirroring what I am already doing to myself. In fact, I thank him for playing his part so brilliantly that I got to see where my inner mind was out of alignment with a higher truth - or simply put, where I was out of integrity with myself. Once I see the issue play out on the screen of my life, I have the gift of understanding myself and my not-yet resolved issues or false beliefs at a much deeper level. With that knowing and dose of self compassion, I can easily and effortlessly change the station in my head and completely tune out the station that was creating “static in my life”. After all, we all know that the static in your life is the result of static in your mind. Oh, you didn’t know that on this deeper level? Well, now you do. Thanks for accepting that gift. We should go out and celebrate that one. I’ll take my pink champagne with extra bubbles - and extra pinkiness, but only if I believe I can have it all - and I do. Those bubbles go straight to my head and make me feel overwhelming joy and bliss. No wait. The joy and bliss was already there. It’s the bubbles that are new. O.K. the bubbles make me feel bubbly. Oh, I get it. That’s why they call them bubbles. Why didn’t you tell me? Sometimes I am so silly and slow - just like I love to be. Unless of course, I’m serious and speedy. Than, that’s how I love to be. Of course, there is silly and speedy but that just creates more trouble than it’s worth. Let’s not leave out serious and slow - now there is a deadly combination. Still no laughter from you? I thought that was funny - deadly combination - serious and slow? O.K., I’ll laugh alone and laugh at myself for laughing alone. I have so much fun being me. Think about how much fun you will have being you once you drop all your fears, concerns and pretenses. Then we can really play together! Don’t forget the ice cream. Can’t have real fun without vanilla bean mint ice cream. Just so you know.

Anyway, back to the rock. No, no, we finished the rock part of the story. Back to the ear and how my seemingly lazy clogged ear was actually actively facilitating the birth of lefty - extremely well I must say. So, that leads us to the very reason why I started writing this blog (blog - public diary that you get to express only that which you want of yourself - for me, that’s almost everything. Why not everything, you say? A girls gotta have some secrets to keep the romance alive. Have I told you how beautiful you feel today? Or was that yesterday? Tomorrow? Oh, yes, now I see. It is yesterday, today and tomorrow. Thanks for allowing me the privilege of feeling your energy. You allowed it simply by reading this. To the extent that you are openly receiving all the messages contained in my blog, I am able to sense your energy. Messages are both obvious and covertly hidden below the surface; sometimes even to myself - I may not perceive all the hidden messages and signs to awakening but your subconscious mind sure does - and it responds instantly.

By the way, true permanent transformation can only happen effortlessly in an instant. All that hard work leading up to transformation was just some darn good dress rehearsals. Bravo! But as soon as you are ready, your subconscious mind will find the catalyst in the world to press the button and snap you into a whole new reality of yourself - and of, “all of life”. I am simply your finger on the button. Zap, boom, abracadabra - it’s done. That was easy. Can we do it again? How about if I share my ice cream with you? Better yet, I don’t wanna share! I’ll buy you one of your own in your favorite flavor, adorned anyway you desire - anyway! Imagine the possibilities now. I do have to warn you, if your ice cream turns out better than mine, I will have to steel it from you when you aren’t looking and eat it quickly along with mine of course. Good thing I don’t believe in calories any more. That was such a silly story I told about calories and getting fat. I am so glad I finally got through that one.

For those of you wondering if I am crazy.  I am - but what does that say about you? Think about how much you have already invested into my random “out loud thinking”.  If I’m crazy, than you must be too. Do we need to compete for the “craziness gold ribbon” and glorious crown? I should warn you; when I was sixteen, I escaped from a locked and guarded mental hospital in New York. How did I end up there?  My mom was simply frightened for my life because I had left home and gotten seriously involved with a man who really was “crazy” - in the medically diagnostic way. My actions were outwardly rebellious where I was once sweet and I blatantly defied all the rules; sounds like a normal teenager to me. My motto was “It’s important to know the rules so you know how to break them”. Yes, that is still one of my more secret mottos today. Well, actually - a greater truth would be this; all rules are made up and only exist to control us because we have signed an unconscious agreement that we would allow ourselves to be controlled by them; at least until we wake up one day (like today for example) and suddenly realize, in the core of our being, that all rules and laws were hilarious.

When you awaken to the indisputable knowing of who you really are, all man-made rules, conditions and limiting laws will completely and instantly disappear into the smoke screen they were intended to be; the one brilliantly in place until you wake up from the unconscious dream and you choose to dream a better dream. Dream a better dream and your life will have to surrender limitations and oblige by manifesting it in your very tangible experience; that tenacious thing you call “your life”. Remember, your life can not be expressed one bit greater than your core dreams and beliefs. Don’t bang your head against the wall trying to change what you experience on the projector’s screen (your life) - instead, change the dream - otherwise known by me as your story.

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Speaking of “rules”, I’d like to complete my thought on that previous subject Once you see though the silliness of all “made up” rules and laws, and the punishments for disobeying them, the rules and laws cease to have any power over you; even if you are subject to an authority figure’s merciless infringement on your personal being or your belongings. It matters not that the authority figures and everyone else continues to play the game of powerlessness and control and dominance and punishment; you see it for the illusion it has always been and you no longer choose to energetically engage - regardless of whether or not you choose to follow the laws of the land. Now, it’s simply a choice and not because you are frightened into submission. I think about all the times that was true for me. I have compassion for the “ignorant” and more asleep me of the past, but, honestly, I am so GLAD I woke up from that bad bedtime story. Now I just see authority figures, and those frightened into submission, as little five year olds acting out a good game of cops and robbers; trying on both roles to decide which one is more fun or easier to portray. I let them; all the while remembering them for the intrinsic power of who they really are, and, one day awakening to a higher truth. That truth being; when you know and own your intrinsic power, there is nothing left to control. Suddenly, you are free to simply choose and if you don’t like what you have chosen, evidenced by how it shows up in your life, guess what? You get to choose again and again until you get it just right and put your order in for some more of that (ala mode!)!

Here’s my disclaimer on breaking the rules; when you reach an enlightened state of awareness and awakeness, you intrinsically have respect for all around you and your behavior is an inherent expression of that uncompromisable (new word) respect. When you have this total understanding in every cell in your body, it is impossible to do any intentional or unconscious harm to another human being or to anything living on this planet, including all those things we don’t realize as living (like the mirror in your bathroom or the Empire State Building, for example). When you uncover this state of consciousness, you clearly see and feel, that all rules and laws are of a lower, more asleep consciousness and there is no need or desire to lower your consciousness to suit the story of the world; whether that be your in your own family or the silly global story of limitations, scarcity and fear.

How does that story go again?

You know, something like “once upon a time, the humans of planet earth believed that there was only so much to go around and you had to claw and climb for your share of the pie or you die. Pie or Die? What a choice? You could only survive and thrive at the expense of others even if you never knew what that expense really was.”

Somewhere in the middle of the story, give or take, a miraculous awakening occurred. Much to everyone’s surprise and delight, the humans of earth started recognizing their story to be one of lack, limitation and scarcity while simultaneously realizing that if even one being on the planet is suffering, so is every being. Suddenly, they truly understood that concept of “Win-Win” - if even one loses, all lose. Everyone must win and feel as if they are winning for anyone to win.

With this new awareness ingrained in their newly forming DNA, the leaders of the world (not necessarily based on credentials, smiling ability or electoral votes) came together to form “One Nation Under God;. Indivisible; with Liberty and Justice for All.” After centuries, they finally understood what that really meant and if that did not include every nation in the world, it was not One Nation and God wanted no part of it (just kidding); God is always a part - that is the ONE THING that is absolute and never changing or faltering in any way - the ONLY THING. How cool is that?

Anyway, back to the targeted point; only a one world community of all living beings could be indivisible - anything less is inherently divisible. Finally, Liberty and Justice for All means exactly that; unconditional freedom AND equal, unquestionable rights for ALL - I do mean all. When you limit even one of “the all” with conditions and proof of worthiness, you limit the entire All. With all this in mind (and heart, of course), the self proclaimed and self-chosen leaders set forth to implement a new vision for their Mother - fondly known as Earth. With that vision clearly agreed upon by all, they charted the path that would undoubtedly complete the mission and ultimate divine purpose of creating the NEW WORLD of ONE -ONENESS.

In this New World, everyone is encouraged to express themselves fully in their divine uniqueness; clumsiness or splendor makes no difference. A world where there is no crime nor punishment and if someone should do harm to another in any way, he is compassionately given a “time out”. Not as a punishment or to shame him into compliance but rather as a safe space for him to be lovingly assisted in working out his personal issues until he realigns himself with his own personal integrity of honor and respect, to the highest degree, for himself; and as a natural result of him honoring and respecting himself, in the creators definition of honor and respect, he effortlessly projects that into the world in his actions, energy and behaviors.

There is no room for laws, rules or crime in this world. In this world, each being exponentially grows as they experience themselves to be more and more truly amazing and also clearly seeing and experiencing that same sense of unlimited potential in all others - and even consciously looking for it because they want to rejoice in anothers’ gifts, insights and abilities. Imagine yourself in this New World. How does that feel?

If you didn’t already know, I thrilled to be the first to tell you that along with the collective all of earth, YOU are now dreaming that New World into Creation and just now beginning to take tangible action to make that dream a reality. This is your mission. This is your purpose. No matter what you think about yourself and your ability to do this, you are doing FABULOUS! Right on time. How do I know? Simple - you are reading this, aren’t you? Right on divine-time.

Now that you know the truth and are rest assured of your mission and purpose upon the planet, you can consciously choose exactly how you want to implement and activate the New Dream in your neck of the woods - be that your family, neighborhood, nation or global community. The possibilities are endless and to tell you the truth, Earth requires all of them for the smoothest transformation. So explore, express and exclaim your vision for the New One World!

Finally, confidentially-knowing that even your smallest murmur in a loud crowd is heard clearly and distinctly, and is the ripple in the pond of awakening for all - for the planet. This is the MOST exciting time to live on Earth in the history of Earth. How lucky are we to be the chosen few to bring the New World into manifestation by first allowing the old one to naturally collapse to the light of a higher truth.

By the way, in case you were wondering - you got to be one of the chosen few because you chose yourself and stepped up to play in the game. It really is that simple. Choose yourself for whatever you want to create, accomplish or transcend in life. Take it from me, once you absolutely choose, to the point where their was never really was a choice in the first place, your life will reorganize itself around your new choice and suddenly everything that you have been struggling to attain and claim as your own, will effortlessly and naturally appear before you.

~Think it ~
~ Believe it ~
~ Know it ~
~ Choose it ~
~ Action it ~
~ Be it ~

Live it!

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